Week 5 - Diary Room

[heather]

7/15/2015


_{Neda trying to mend fences with me after she lied to my face and told me that she was gonna vote to keep Shilpa. Bitch GTFO.}

I respect people who are honest with me in this house.  I know that this is Big Brother and that people are gonna lie to me sometimes, but when it's absolutely unnecessary for someone to do so, that's when I'm fucking done.



I didn't even campaign to Neda (or anyone else for that matter!)  I think that deep down, I knew that the writing was on the wall, and that I'd only be doing myself more harm than good if I tried to fight it.  I did ask some people what they were doing though, just out of curiosity and because some of them had told me that they were previously undecided.  Memphis, Nick and Zach all had the balls to tell me the truth.  Some other people, like Brian and Boog, gave me the usual vague answers.  With Neda I got this:

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Seriously screw you Neda.  I knew immediately that she was lying to me too... it was so obvious and so annoying because there was no reason for her to do it!

This past round was just super eye opening for me.  I refuse to play this game with bottom feeders who are going to be all wishy-washy and then try to hide behind the better competitors with bigger targets on their backs.  If I win HOH, I'm not going after any of Heaven, Ryan or Sofia... sorry, not sorry!  Floaters, you better grab a life vest!

[heather]

7/17/2015

With Shilpa gone, and Christine most likely following her out the door, my options in this game are rapidly diminishing, and I'm kinda freaking out about it!  I have solid relationships with a lot of people, but I need something concrete alliance wise, and fast, or I could easily wind up getting screwed!  From my vantage point, Nick and Zach are the ones running things in the house right now, and for my game, it's essential that they both want me around.  I played pretty brazenly early on, saving Keith twice and then knowingly voting in the minority last week, but right now, my best chance for survival is gonna be to get in the backseat and let Zach drive for a little while.

It's not ideal and I definitely didn't come here to be the girl who gets screwed over by some  bromance right before the finals (why does that always happen on BB?), but the alternative would be to basically go down with a sinking ship.  I do believe that there will be a point in the game where the tides will turn and the competition beasts will start to cannibalize... I just have to make sure that Memphis and I both make it to that point.

I'm banking on my relationship with Ryan as my trump card to hopefully shake things up down the stretch.  I joke about the two of us being an item, but I don't think that anybody realizes exactly how close he and I are.  My primary loyalty is to Memphis, but if that doesn't plan out, I trust Ryan more than almost anybody else left in this house.  Ryan tells me things in confidence that I doubt Heaven or Sofia would really approve of (nomination plans, targets, etc.)  I just can't be naive about where I stand in the game.

[heather]

7/18/2015

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_{Not to be sappy or overly sentimental but this is the side of Keith that I wish other people could see sometimes.  I really do trust him to have my back more than anybody else in this house.}

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+

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=

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Heather and Keith, a true sibling relationship.

[heather]

Partners Assessment




I feel like I really lucked out getting paired with Boog because not only is she a strong competitor, but she's also somebody who I feel like I can definitely trust.  I know that she's close with Candice, but if we win Head of Household I'm putting #Caneda up on my end, hands down.  I would consider shooting for a Sofia backdoor but I'm not making the same mistake that Christine made by putting a player like that up outright.  Still, I have Boog's back going forward.




The composition of this pair scares me just a little bit because I could see Ryan being toast if they ever wind up on the block post-Veto.  I'd be worried about Brian too, to an extent, but it's just that Ryan is my boy.  If he's ever on the chopping block, I will go to bat for him harder than probably anybody else aside from Keith and Memphis.  The silver lining is that if these guys come into power next week, I feel pretty safe!




Oh #Caneda... as they say, 'you snooze, you lose!'  They missed out on a golden opportunity last week, but it's cute how all of a sudden they're worried about the status quo.  The odds are that these girls will be in a very precarious spot next round, and while I'm not out for vengeance, I'd be lying if I didn't admit that their despair would leave me quite satisfied.




I love both of these girls and it kills me to see them on the block this week.  I'm really struggling because I promised Zach that I wouldn't evict Rachelle, but my heart is telling me to keep both Christine and Hayley!  It sucks because I could probably pull off saving Christine, but strategically that would be game suicide.  I'd have to go behind Zach's back and he would lose all trust in me.  My game would be as good as done, because he'd throw his lot in with Heaven and Sofia and together they'd sweep comps to the endgame, just like Dixie, Dominic, Estelle and Rhian did in AS1.




My homies!  I feel like these two being together is a mostly good thing.  I think that they're definitely one of the safest pairs in the game as of right now.  Thankfully, if they are nominated at the end of next week, I won't necessarily have to decide between them because I can always just evict both members of whichever pair they're up against.  My biggest concern is that Zach may try and pull a fast one, if he can, to get Keith out.  I def need to be on my toes in case that happens!  Luckily I think that it's unlikely as long as Zach continues to feel comfortable with Keith.




#Brick is yesterday's news!  Nick has moved on from Brian and is now a part of the new 'it couple!'  Just thinking about these two interacting as a team is hilarious to me.  Nick is so snarky and I'm sure that he's having a heyday with poor clueless Matt.




I'm probably in the minority on this, but I'm kinda over the little love story that we've got going on here.  I'm curious to know how much of their feuding is even legit anymore.  They've got some sort of deal in place, I know it.




Mike and Sofia better watch out because these two are giving them a run for their money when it comes to which duo is the most dysfunctional!  My favorite Ash revelation from this round was that he doesn't bother talking to people that he doesn't like... LMAO Ash, buddy, do you know what game you signed up for?  Good riddance!  With Rachelle, I think it's pretty telling how chummy she's being with me all of a sudden now that her ass is on the line, but I'm gonna try and make lemonade out of lemons and cultivate a new relationship there.  I've already secured myself with her for next week should she and Hayley (#Haychelle?) win.




Is it bad that I felt safer with Heaven this week than I did with Zach?  Maybe that's because Ryan told me all about Heaven's plans for this round (replacements, targets, etc.) or maybe it's just that I'm a little wary of the latter after everything that went down last week... IDK.

I've been working on my relationship with Heaven pretty diligently and I think that the two of us have established a really good rapport for the future (gotta give credit to Ryza too for the assist/putting in a good word!)  Zach and I on the other hand (and all of our friend group, both evicted and still in the house) are probably gonna need some sort of heavy duty group therapy after all of this is over.

[heather]

7/19/2015

Since this is Big Brother, I figured that I should probably, you know, find myself a solid alliance, especially if I want to ensure my survival during the upcoming midseason massacring of basic bitches.



So I approached Nick and we both agreed that since we're pretty much already working with Memphis and Zach as it is, that getting the four of us together officially wouldn't such a bad idea.  

We all met up in the back bedroom and 'Gatorade' was formed!  I named it 'Gatorade' because phonetically it sounds like one of those dumb alliance names like 'Renegades' or 'The Brigade' but it also makes no sense because gatorade is like... a sports drink...

[Shir]

I feel personally insulted by your assessment of the Renegades alliance name.

[heather]

Shir Please don't be mad I love the two guys in that alliance.  

[Shir]

You are forgiven <3